A curious spirit with undying thirst to thrust unto the deepest realm of humans senses. A continual journey to challenge an intellectual pursuit. And a sensitive soul pursuing to the meaning of each bumps and bruises on each corner of this journey we call Life.
The other day I had this dream. Dream that I could not really understand. I can not find the logic. But then, how can we really find logic in dreams, right?
It is normal for me to dream about my work. When I was in the finance department of EEI Corporation, i dreamt about my vouchers. When I was in the call center as an agent, I dreamt i was troubleshooting a customers' computer. When I became I Quality Assurance Analyst, I dreamt my scoring form. I was going over each line item and I was analyzing a call. That said, i suppose it is not a surprise if I dreamt about some of the topics I wrote. I do not know why is that. That is just me.
Anyways, I came across a home improvement software while writing about a given subject. When I slept that night, i saw the features of this software. Of course, the context is accorded to my own specifications. Hey, it was my dream. Had you experience dreaming wherein you are an observer? You are not part of the dream. You are in the distance observing the dream. I had a number of dreams like that. On my case, some one was with me every time I dream like that. Some one was actually talking to me while I was seeing the events in my dream. Sometimes the voice was explaining to me what was happening. But I do not know who that voice was. No hint and no idea. And I did not bother to know. The thing with me is that I still remember my dream even when I wake up.
On this particular dream, the software consists of squares separated by spaces. Each square has a visual door. When I entered one door, i saw a memory in the past. I felt the pain stabbed my heart. I could vividly feel that kind of pain when I am awake. There was no need to open the other squares. They were too many. This voice just showed me that these squares existed. That they are there. Then the voice told me " They happened because they must happen. It could be very painful but there was a purpose why it happened to you. It was designed to work for you. To make you a better being".
That was it. I woke up. As I said, I usually remember my dream. I still felt the stabbing pain. Or the memory of it. Maybe the voice was the subconscious part of me? I do not know. Let us put those idealistic wisdom out of the window for now, shall we? Here is what I can not comprehend.
That voice said "bad things happen in order to make me better". I am on my mid life now. I know for a fact that pain and bad experiences never go away. When I was younger, I used to say time heals all wound. But as I grow older, i realized they never really go away. We just have to know how to deal and live with it. We have to roll, so to speak. But the pain, or the memory of pain, is embedded in our hearts. The memory will never go away. It leaves a scar. And the scar will never disappear. That is just how life is.
Hence, bad experiences stays, and the pain becomes part of us, we just learned to deal with it, how can that make us a better person?
Is it because we learn to live and accept that life is not really as good as some say it is? I do not know. But you know what? I just realized it now while I was putting in words that dream of mine. Maybe being a better person does not necessarily mean we can not feel the pain anymore. Maybe....
I could not really say I am too old. However, I had been experiencing forgetfulness. I had been asking my self, what could be the reason for such? Are you on the same predicament?
As some of my virtual colleagues had known, I had been in a call center industry for years. One of my supervisors had noted that a night being awake can pop out one of our cells. The cell affected has something to do with our memory. Honestly, I can not attest to the veracity of the word. However, I could not help but to think that maybe there is a shed of truth in it.
Our brain is one of the important facet of our body. Every cell in our body reports to our brain. The senses acquired by the main sensory organs of our body is reported to the brain. Every movement in the smallest fiber in our body is connected to our brain. Above all, a sound disposition would require a fully functional brain. If compared to a computer, the brain is the mother board. Remove the mother board. Surely you will have no computer.
I suppose the main question here is that, how do we take care of our brain? Let us go with the basics for now.
One significant step is to keep our brain busy. Challenge your self. Indulge to activities that would require you to think. Read books as well. Eat healthy foods. There are a lot of things that we could do in order to take care of our brain. We will go over to each of them on the next succeeding post.
Hope I will be speaking this subject with you, on my next posts.
This morning, Vincent was surfing to the internet. He called my attention. He then showed me a website that is offering a home based job. Of course, who would not want a source of income? And so, I checked it out. Unfortunately, I realized it is one of those sites that has to be paid a certain amount before you could start working for them.
The nature of the job is that you will give your opinion about a certain product. Then you will be paid for it. Sounds good. On top of that, being paid for your honest opinion is believable.
It is said that you can earn as much as $30,000 a month for the task. You would have to buy something though, I can not recall anymore the term used for what you will be paying for. You will be paying $70.00 rounded off . That is the portion that shatters me. How much is $70.00 in Philippine Peso? If the conversion rate is 46, then that would be 3,200.00 Philippine Peso. Wheew...would you pay that amount for a job that you are unsure of?
If you will type "work from home" in the search engine, surely many will come up. Surely one can say that internet has a vast array of working opportunity. Hey, my arms are wide open. I, for one, is earning significant amount through writing. Therefore, I could definitely attest that there is good money through internet work.
However, it took years before I am able to stumble to good paying jobs. I had been scammed on the process. Bottom line is that, while there are a vast array of work online, there are a lot of scams as well. I say we have to be very careful. When I was new in the internet work, friends advised me never, never go to jobs where I would be required to pay a certain amount before I start working. I also read that in a number of articles I read. This said, I had been doubtful about jobs where I should be paying before starting to work.
How about you, had you known any body who gave money to a site and really was able to land to a legit source of income? Had they received the payment they so deserve? More importantly, was their money returned through their income? It would be a welcome to know of some one who really earned income after paying for their job.
Personally, I am doubtful. Following logic, why would you give money to your employer so you could render service to them?
As I had been continuously acknowledging the people who had been included in my friends list, here is one of them.
Thank you, Jane. I appreciate you being a member of my friends list.
Jean is actually the newest member of my friends list in my other blog, CensWorld2. She has two blogs. These are Love of Learning and Days of our life. Her blog is a manifestation of her faith. You would be able to read her encounters and thoughts about her surrounding and its relation to her faith.
I hope you would not mind, I took the liberty to including the picture in this post.
Thank you Jane, for being the recent follower of one of my simple abode, Censworld2.
It was a typical night like any ordinary night. I believe it was my day-off. I was watching a television with my son. Vincent was ten or eleven year old then. There was this commercial on cigarette. Do you still recall the commercial on cowboys and cigarette? I believe it was Marlboro Country.
Vincent was already curious then. He asked me about the commercial and about cigarette. I recalled he even asked me if there is a need to smoke to be a real man. He further said he watched that in the television. I explained to my son how it is to be a real man. As you can see, he was curious at the time. The conversation about how it is to be a real man was further explained to him in my own way on another occasion. I will tell you about that conversation as well. But then, that will be on another date.
Now, let us go back to that faithful date. I told Vincent that smoking has nothing to do with being a real man. I further explained to my son the health issues that smokers encounter. Further, advising him that it is not good for a man or a woman to smoke. He nodded and said, "So, it is really bad to smoke?" With a firm "yes" I answered, with a wink. Again, I replied "Yes, son. It is bad to smoke". Little did my son knew at the time that his mother was smoking.
After the television show, I sent my son to bed. Believing he was asleep, I went downstairs. For some reason, I had the urge to smoke. I went to the gate and light my first stick of cigarette. I was already halfway when I noticed some one was on the window on the second floor of the house. It was directly adjacent to where I was standing then. When I stared hard, I realized it was Vincent. I did not know how long he was standing there. He was watching me as I inhaled and exhaled nicotine.
When I realized Vincent was my silent audience, I froze. I immediately threw the cigarette and hurried upstairs. There was my son, standing by the window. His eyes were inquiring. I think I saw hurt in those innocent eyes. I felt trapped. Should I lie? He said " You said it is bad to smoke?" My knees weaken. I sat beside my kid.
I remembered hearing my own voice saying "Yes, son. I am smoking. And i did not lie when I said it is bad to smoke. I am sorry. It is my mistake. Tell you what, I promise that the cigarette you saw is going to be the last cigarette that I will smoke. Let me prove that to my best friend, please! His inquiring eyes looked at me directly. He asked "Is it a real promise?" I swear and pledged my promise. Then I told him "truce?". We had this hand gesture, you see! It is like saying "Ok, we are cool". Up until today, we had that hand gesture.
I remembered his face lighten up. He held my hand as I guided him back to his bed. As I cover him with his blanket and kissed him on his forehead, I bid him good night.
You see, I was ashamed to my son. How can I tell him it is wrong and still do it? How can I tell him not to do it when he knows I am doing it?
That was more or less ten years ago. Every time I thought of smoking, I thought of my promise. I never smoked since then. Not even once. I did not back slide. Not even once. I stopped smoking in cold turkey, so to speak.
I stopped smoking not because of cancer. I stopped smoking not because of bad breath, unpleasant smell nor the expense that goes with the vise. I stopped smoking because I promised to my son that I will quit smoking.
His inquiring and hurt expression was enough to make me ashamed.
His smile was enough to remind me that I can never risk breaking the credibility of my word to him.
The recent member of my friends list is Jacque. Her blog is Behind the Scene. Upon visiting her site, it projects the creative mind of a blogger. Artistic as her taste is, the blending and colors complements the whole picturesque of her site.
Thank you Jacque for being a member of my friends list. I hope you do not mind, I took the liberty to posting your picture as well.
I am not sure if it was Monday or Tuesday night when the storm came here in the Philippine. If I am not mistaken the storm was named "Basyang" aka Conson. I remembered waking up at 4:00am. I could feel the strong winds outside the window. I could feel the strong rain as well. Or was it just the wind? I could not really tell. Every thing was dark. I tried to step into my sons' room. I was surprised that my son was already awake. He said there was a black out. Thinking that the electricity would be back in no time, I did not give it much thought. I went back to bed because there was nothing I could do anyway. I could not even go down to the first floor of our house because every thing was dark.
I woke up at 6:00am. I immediately sat on my bed. I thought I over slept. But then, my surrounding was still very dark. It was as if it was still 4:00am. I thought the sky was too dark for 6:00 in the morning. But then, I remembered, there was a storm. As my feet touched the floor, I realized there were still no electricity. It started to worry me.
I went downstairs. My sibling told me that it was a black out in the whole street. I thought It was only our Street that was affected. I thought maybe because of the storm that night. That morning I went out. As I walked in the streets, some establishment were not open that day. There was no electricity even on the main road. It was on the latter part of that day when I learned that the electric failure had affected not only our vicinity but a significant part of Luzon. My sister in law told me then that it would take at least four days in order to fully resolve the issue.
You know, the storm was only less than a day. In fact, there was no flood in our area. However, what struck me was the black out. The storm had been long gone, but the black out still lingers around.
But then, do you know that as per Phil Star, the total damage caused by the typhoon in the Philippine territory had caused P73.4Million in Agriculture and P144.60 in Infrastructure. Just imagine the businesses that were not able to operate especially during the black out days? How much were lost from these businesses on that day?
How about you, what happened to you during the storm Basyang aka Conson?
I wrote about the Reasons Why You Should Stop Smoking. I also wrote about The Reasons Why It is Difficult to Quit Smoking. Let us now talk about the tips on how you could start quitting. Smoking is addictive. Hence, it is advisable to take it one step at a time.
Fist thing to work on is your motivation. Even in losing weight, motivation is very important. This is going to be your driving force to continue especially during the craving moment. So, why do you want to stop smoking? Maybe because of health reasons. You do not want to have lung cancer. Just imagine the limitations once you acquire lung cancer. Or maybe, you are tired of unpleasant odor in your finger tips, in your hair or even your breath. Or maybe because it is becoming heavy to your budget. What ever the reason, make sure you can hold on to it with your firm grip. You will definitely be needing that during craving times.
Keep away from temptation, so they say. Therefore, remove your lighter, match, cigarette pack. Anything associated with smoking should be a hundred miles away from you. It is better if you will also avoid possible scenarios that would eventually tempt you to smoke, again.
Know what triggers your craving. Do you have the persistent craving to hit one stick after a meal? When you are stressed-out? When you want to relax? When you are watching TV? What are the instances that arouses your craving? Knowing what triggers your addiction could help you determine how to lessen the instances of those triggering moments.
Make an alternative. You can go with chewing gum. You know, maybe I could consider myself lucky. I used to smoke. However, I am able to rid of smoking in cold turkey. Maybe because I was not your traditional smoker. I did smoke and there was occasional cravings. My trigger was when I was stressed-out. The last time I hit a stick was 10 years ago. My son was ten or eleven years old then. Never had one ever since I stopped. Never went through withdrawals. Never back slide, even once. How did it happen? I will tell you about it on my future post. Perhaps on my next post. I can tell you now that one of the alternatives I used was coffee. An alternative may not be good enough but it would do rather than nothing at all.
Create an activity for yourself. Be busy. Cravings will be on its peak on the first weeks of quitting. On this stage, cravings will come pretty strong. You must be firm. The problem with cravings is that the more you say "No", the more it tempts you. Divert your thoughts. Enroll in a gym. If and when you have the cravings, go to the gym and work out. Have a hobby. Associate with a non smoker group. Talk to some one. Do something. Do not just allow the craving to get to you.
Some say that you should have a schedule. The problem with a schedule is that if you backslide, the effect is more damaging. This is especially when you are almost near your target date and you back slide. Target date can be stressful. You will be expecting that at this point, you had already achieved up to a certain level of improvement. If you feel you had not, it could be very frustrating. Also, once you reached the target date and you back slide after wards, the feeling of failure can be over whelming.
However, it depends on a person really. If a target date works for you, i say go for it. For me, i think focus on small results matters. Do it one step at a time. Until the time when you can finally stand on your own. Until you reach the time when you do not crave anymore. If you stumble, no pressure. Stand up. Gather yourself and start again. If it takes forever, so be it. Make it your personal battle to stop smoking. I think that is more effective.
There are more ways to stop smoking. I hope you are able to pick one or two from this post. Remember that it does not matter how many times you stumble. What matters is how many times you stand up. Never, never give up. If I may repeat, giving up is NEVER an option.
We were standing in line for a taxi on our way home. It was our grocery schedule, you see. When it was our turn for the next available taxi, I immediately jumped in. I was in a hurry to get home. My thoughts were on the tasks waiting for me at home.
As soon as I sat inside the cab, I smelled something. Smell of food, actually. A faint smell could come really strong in an air conditioned and closed cab. That was when I noticed a plastic full of foods. The first thing that came to my mind was that a passenger left an unconsumed food. As I looked closer to the plastic, I realized that that content was not unconsumed after all. They were left-over of foods contained in a plastic bag. The bag was even wide open.
The taxi driver seemed to have read my mind. He said a group of students left the plastic bag. The students came from San Beda College, Recto. When they reached their destination, they left their trash behind. The plastic bag was there sitting at the back seat.
How would you feel if you were on my shoe?
I do not know really if these students were from San Beda College, Recto. I had not even seen them to know that. Maybe these students just happened to be in front of San Beda College when they got the taxi. Or, maybe there are really students of San Beda College. We can never really know.
The thing is that, they are students. As the driver even said "Tsk...tsk..mga estudyante pa naman!" Let us not generalize. After all, not all students are irresponsible. However, incidents like these are quite disappointing. Do you know what was the first thing that came to my mind? "I wonder how these students are at home?" Do they just throw their garbage anywhere?
Our national hero had once said "Ang kabataan ang pag-asa ng bayan". The younger generations are the hopes of our country. After all, they are the next generation who will run this country. If these kids can not even learn how to deal with their own garbage, how could they handle bigger responsibilities?
Do you know that we can read people by how they reacted to and deal with little things? Mistakes in the past had thought me that lesson. Some might say this is a small matter. But really, what does this say about this group of students? What do you think?
Personally, I am hoping, really hoping, that this is not the picture of the younger generation.
One of the recent members of my friends list is Mr. Old Geezer. When I saw his blog, my eyes were transfixed on his blog description. Old Geezer said;
"Old Age Ain't For Sissies! - Do Not Resent Growing Old. Many Are Denied The Privilege"
I used to be in a working environment where people believes that getting old and being old means being extinct. The choice of their words and their body language means "once a person becomes old, they become a big joke". The irony was that, they were half my age. Imagine the torment I had with my co-workers then.
When I saw Old Geezers' blog, I said, "Wow! I stumbled on one soul who believes that getting old is not really a bad thing." It made me feel nice.
But then, this is not about me. This is about Mr. Old Geezer. His site is "The Old Geezeer Blog". He had interesting and thought provoking posts. When you have time, do visit his site as well.
Thank you, Mr. Old Geezeer for being a member of my friends list. Thank you, too, for the wisdom you had been continuously sharing with your reader.
By the way, I hope you did not mind, i posted the picture as well.
Again, thank you for being a member of my friend lists.
Smoking has caused cancer and various terminal illnesses. It can be expensive because you have to support your vice on a regular basis. Because of this, cigarette becomes a part of our regular expense.
If you will really think about it, smoking is a hazard in every way. It gives us bad breath. It leaves a strong unpleasant odor in our clothes. It is not easy in our budget. It makes us its slave when we crave for it. It gives us cancer. With all of these, why is it difficult to stop the habit? Why do we still crave?
We know that cigarette contains nicotine. And I also mentioned in my previous post the description of the word. Merriam Webster defined nicotine as “a poisonous and addictive substance in tobacco that is used as an insecticide.”
Given the effects of nicotine to our health, let us talk about the reason why it is so difficult to drop it…..permanently. You see, one cigarette contains 10 milligrams of nicotine. Once we smoke, at least one or two milligrams are inhaled in our system. Nicotine then mixes up with our bloodstream. After which, it finds its way to our brain. From the brain, it secretes dopamine. A dopamine is a substance that produces gratifying sensation.
The release of dopamine makes the smokers feel gratification on each stick of cigarette inhaled. This arises the tendency to go back for more. The problem is that in order to get a certain level of euphoria, you would have to inhale more.
On top of dopamine, cigarette works as anti-depressant as well. The effect is only temporary though. This is the reason why smokers have the urge to grab a cigarette under a stressful situation.
The release of dopamine is one of the major reasons why it is difficult to quit smoking. There are many more. Despite the gratifying euphoria, the fact remains that smoking is and will always be bad for our health.
I hope I am able to share something with you today.
This post is to thank one of the new members of my friends list. Her name is Lhey. Actually, her name is Leonora. Lhey is her nick name.
I am pleased to find that new members were added to my friends list. When I checked out her blog, I say it is cool. My goodness, she is gorgeous. She is a singer and a mom. She will talk with you her adventures with her kids and her life as well.
What is happening in July 9? Maybe nothing much in my country. Maybe nothing much in other countries. However, in Canada, it is a holiday today.
July 9 is a Nunavut Day in Canada. This is actually the annual holiday in Canada. On this date, Nunavut was officially separated from the Northwest Territories. This became possible through the Nunavut Claims Agreement Act and the Nunavut Act in July 9, 1993. Further, it became a Canadian territory in April 1, 1999.
This event is celebrated through group meals, local gatherings, games and dances and more merry making. Above all, inculcating the heritage left by this memoir through competitions and presentations.
I had been in a call center industry for more or less 4 years. With that span of time, i could fairly say that 85% to 90% of my co-workers are smokers. Some expressed an intention to stop smoking. Those are just words. After a while, I will be seeing them in the smokers' area again. They know that smoking is not good for their health. I think every smokers knows that. However, quitting seemed too difficult.
Really, why do they have to stop smoking?
Let us count the reasons....
One of the component of a cigarette is nicotine. According to Merriam Webster, a Nicotine is poisonous and addictive substance in tabacco that is used as an insecticide. One pack of cigarette contains 10 milligrams of nicotine. Once you hit that stick, 1 to 2 milligrams will enter your body. It will find its way to your bloodstream. Then as soon as it is already absorbed by your bloodstream, it will work its way up to your brain. Afterward, it will find its way to your organs. Once nicotine mixes with your bloodstream, it can not create oxygen. What is the result of this, it will result blood clot. Not abrupt. Blood clotting will transpire gradually as you pile up more nicotine when you inhale nicotine in your system.
This causes stroke, lung cancer and cardiovascular disease. Statistically, the highest contributor of cancer is lung cancer. The highest percentage of lung cancer comes from smokers.
This said, what could be the sane reason why a person should persist on inhaling nicotine?
Please do not take my word for it. If this post touches you in anyway, make your own research.
I have another blog that I was not able to maintain. I checked it again and I am thinking of working on it.
You see, I like to read. I love information. I believe that our mind, the human mind, should be filled with useful knowledge. Not only that it is interesting to know new things but information guides us when the need arises. As I did wrote in one of my post, you can never know when such need arises.
I am thinking that through my 2nd blog, I would be able to share information. When you have time, please feel free to visit my "Censworld2". There are no much entries yet. However, as time progresses, I hope there will be enough information that could be shared with you.
It is not easy to maintain more than one blog. It is difficult especially during hectic days. However, I am hoping i would be able to pull it through.
Just this afternoon I am writing the articles requested by the client. As I grope for the appropriate words and phrases, what you see below came into my mind. It is as if it is a set of words that paraded in my thoughts. And so, I pulled up a notepad and placed the thoughts in writing. Here it is:
"I am drowning in the sea of words and phrases. My mind is swimming with the waves of ideas and thoughts. As I indulge in the bitter sweet rhythm of pen and words [ or keyboard, for that matter]"
Just a thought !!!
Have a great day, every one :)
Oh, by the way, the picture came from yahoo.image. Just to humor you. Put a smile in your face.
Yesterday, Noynoy Aquino had taken his oath as the 15th President of the Philippines. I was not able to watch the oath taking. However, basing on the glimpse and glances from the news, it is apparent that the Filipino people has high hopes that the new government will improve the lives of the Filipinos, especially those who are on the poverty level of the society.
The most that I could do is to read the statement of the president. I was not really able to watch the television that day. I would have to say that I honestly have nothing to say regarding the speech of Pres. Aquino. It is too early to speak. I know, though, that he will be facing a lot of problems ahead of him. I know, too, that no matter who seats in Malacanang, he will have his share of detractors along the way. Just wait after the honeymoon stage of his term. I think every president had had their share of bitter moments and countless criticism.
That said, it have nothing to say. I do have one thing in mind. When I heard a commentator mentioned that Filipinos have high hopes that our lives will progress from hereon because of the promise of the president, I can not help but to take a glimpse on the television screen.
Do not get me wrong. I am not saying that it is incorrect to have hope. However, our lives and our progress in terms of economic standing in the society is not necessarily, entirely dependent on the president. Yes, he should do his share. However, it is us, as individual who will improve the economic status of our lives. If we will not work hard, if we will maintain the crab mentality, manana habit and lack of discipline, I do not think that even Noynoy Aquino could help the Filipino people.
The change should begin with us. We are responsible for our selves and our lives. We can not say that it is up to the government to improve our lives. We have to do our share. We have to work hard. We must work smartly. Because unless we do, no president could help us.